The argument for risky play
Sometimes it feels like we live in a truly risk averse society today. Often children are wrapped in cotton wool to ensure they come to no harm, but while the intention is to protect this also denies them the opportunities that risky play and behaviour provide to learn and develop. Helicopter parenting has become the norm, seriously reducing the freedom children have to play freely.
Outdoor play offers a wealth of opportunities for naturally risky play. We want our children to grow up with resilience, to be independent, to be confident, to be problem solvers.
We want to demonstrate our faith in them to build up their confidence that they can trust their own judgements in life. We want to acknowledge their capability for managing their own risk, we want to teach them to bounce back from failure and we want them to challenge themselves whilst exploring boundaries. We want our children to feel the joy of freedom, to encourage their creativity and enhance their adaptability.
We believe these long term goals to form strong personal characteristics and abilities to help navigate life are of vital importance. We obviously don’t want our children to come to harm but we have to take a risk-benefit assessment to analyse how we can manage risks associated with children’s playful behaviour whilst avoiding children missing out on some highly beneficial learning through this play.
Playing outdoors in nature offers endless opportunities for risky play. You as the parent play the role of supervisor, to be there to support and be ready to help when asked for it but not before. The relationship between children and parents form a very important role in risky play as children need to feel safe and secure enough to embark on risky play in the first place. Parents can help with words of encouragement or role modelling how to do something but doing it themselves.
One of the hardest parts for parents is allowing risky play to happen and spending time outdoors where there is access to the right kind of environment. One of the mottos we live by in every aspect of play we try to use the motto:
“I can help you with my words but not my hands”
This helps to try and edge children towards learning to problem solve, assess risk and build up their resilience. When children want to climb a tree, they’ll often judge for themselves the strongest footholds, the safest route and if they can climb up unassisted, and it’s safe to do, then even better. If they want help in getting back down, try to first using words and not hands to reassure your child that they can do it. They will feel amazing for it.
We want to encourage self belief and confidence. And if there’s anything children can’t do, then use the power of ‘yet’. They can’t do it YET. Failure can offer a wealth of learning opportunities, such as how to best approach the challenge the next time. The excitement and pride of successfully climbing a tree unassisted for the first time is a wonderful thing to see in a young child.
We have faith in our children. They are amazing and we trust in their capabilities. As parents just like us, we’re sure you are regularly astounded at their abilities. Wherever possible, risky play in groups is hugely beneficial. Allowing children to monitor and assess their own and their peers risky play teaches them extremely valuable life skills.
Children are designed to learn emotional resilience through engaging in risky play. They need to encounter fear to learn how to manage it. If we deny our children the opportunity for risky play then we also deny them the opportunity to bolster their mental health.
Let's give children more freedom. Take them outside. Let them climb a tree. Encourage them with words rather than your hands. And revel with them in the thrill of success when they reach the top!
